In this post I am going to be writing about a subject that can bring up a lot of feelings in many people. To get right down to it, we are now living in a world where more people are doubting the existence of a Higher Power and choosing to be atheist. My understanding of what it means to be atheist is that it is a person who does not believe in the existence of God, or any kind of Higher Source of a Divine nature that is omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent. If a person chooses to be atheist, then so be it; that is their choice for whatever reason. We all have free will to make our own decisions, and I do believe that whatever choice that a person makes to believe in God (or not) should be respected. Continue reading →
Sometimes I see people online writing the name of God as G-d, and I always wondered about that. It just seemed very disrespectful to me. One of my neighbors and dear friend is also one of my Facebook connections. She always writes God as G-d, and it never sat well with me. She recently did it again, and I decided to just ask her why people do that. It was time for Xenia to learn something. Continue reading →
I have always been aware of the spiritual energy that is life.
However, since returning from Montreal I have been existing in a space that is so peaceful, warm and giving me signs that everything is going to be alright.
What I came here to do on this planet I will accomplish.
I AM well on my way!
Since the retreat, the joy that I feel doing the things I love to do is now heightened.
Even though there are things in the world right now that are not perfect, I still always felt that this is a beautiful world. I feel that way still, but it is more amplified now.
I don’t care what anyone says to the contrary, this IS a Beautiful world!
Since returning from retreat I have also been a bit challenged about finding things to write about on this blog, so I have not been posting daily like I prefer to do.
I really enjoy blogging.
However, I don’t want to come up with anything just to get a blog post out.
I am so looking forward to the start of school which is September 9th.
I will be carrying a full twelve credits.
The History of Mathematics
Renaissance and Reformation
Educational Planning Workshop
On top of that I also enrolled in two free (but no credit) online college courses via Cousera.
Human Evolution: Past and Present
The Ancient Greeks
As excited as I am about school, at the same time I wish I could pick up and go on spiritual retreat for an entire year.
When you are in the frame of mind that I am in, it can be challenging to get back into the everyday swing of things.
One of my dear friends lives in Paris, France and earlier this year she had the opportunity to spend four months in India.
It was wonderful hearing from her and sharing with me how the experience in India was and how she feels now.
She told me that she was returning to India in about a few days
It had been several weeks since returning to Paris, but she was having a challenge assimilating back into life there after experiencing such profound peace, joy and enlightenment during her spiritual sojourn in India.
I know EXACTLY how she feels.
As much as I am loving my life as it is, there is a part of me that really wants to embark on a year-long spiritual journey. It is something I have dreamed about for years actually.
I still want to attend University, and since I am doing it all online I can live anyplace. As long as I have internet access I’m good.
I would love to close up my house for a year and go on spiritual sojourn to Mount Shasta, Banff in Canada, Ancient England, France, Israel and end up in India before heading back to my house. All the while still earning my degree next June. Actually, for a spiritual sojourn like that I may need two years. 🙂
I MUST take a month or so to take some courses at Oxford, and hopefully encounter a French Vampire named Matthew Clairmont. 🙂
Here is my dear friend at the airport in France waiting to board the plane that will take her back to India. She did arrive safely and is back in her element. I am not sure how long she will be there this time, but it has already been about three weeks.
She is a singer and has a European tour coming up….
When I wake up in the morning I like to say this prayer before starting my day:
This day and everyday I dedicate my life of the Great God Presence, I AM, that abides within and above me. To coming to know that Presence, serving that Presence and that this outer life may become the perfect instrument that the Great God Presence, I AM, may come forth and reveal Itself to the world. In my dedication to the Light, I will serve the one Law being Love. I dedicate my life to expression of Love, being fueled by Love and the great unity of Light and Love.
This is not the entire prayer, but only a portion of it. I have to start my day saying it or else I feel off kilter.
…and live my destiny.
I am going to open up my own spiritual center one day soon and inside of it I am going to hang some of the most beautiful mandalas. I collect images of mandalas and this morning I gathered up some beautiful ones from Pinterest. I love the first one Love’s healing because it has lots of my favorite color which is PINK. I think that I am going to make the altar area in my spiritual center hot pink. I love the idea. So what if some people find it odd. I enjoy thinking outside the box. Besides, where is it written that an altar cannot be hot pink? You think I am kidding don’t you? Thank again…
I am going to have one of the most beautiful spiritual centers that anyone has ever seen.
When I started this blog I decided that I would not include my spiritual beliefs as a regular part of my writing on here, but today I feel an urge to release and let go a little bit. Even though I do not attend church services I still like to set aside time on Sunday to formally acknowledge the I AM Presence that abides within and above me. I acknowledge my “Presence” every day, but on Sundays I like to make more of a big deal of it.
I was born in Panama in Central America in a little place called Colon. My father was born and raised in Colon. My mother was born and raised on a little island off the coast of Panama called Bocas del Toro. Catholicism is widespread in Panama, but I was not raised Catholic. In Colon I was christened at the Inmaculada Concepcion Church. In Panama many people believe that it is best to have your newborn baby blessed right away to ward off evil spirits. Sometimes parents would go straight from the hospital to the church to have their newborn Christened on the way home. While on vacation in Panama in my early twenties my Godmother (now residing on another plane) took me to the church where I was Christened, and she proceeded to show me where she, my parents, my Godfather and the priest stood as she held me in her arms to be blessed. I got a real kick out of that. It really doesn’t take much to entertain me. Anyway, I grew up mostly in the Baptist church, but I did attend Lutheran church services for a few years. For a short period of time I went to Catholic church services.
At age two I emigrated to America with my family. My father came over first. After he got a job at an upholstery factory and saved some money my father sent for me, my brother and mother. My Mom was very religious at the time and she would read passages of the Bible to me and my siblings (3 more children came after we reunited with my father). As a very little girl I had no concept of what my mother was reading to me from the Bible, and quite frankly I am not too sure even now that even my mother understood it fully.
I loved Jesus right away. Jesus Christ was a being that I wanted to be like because he went around healing the sick and I wanted to do the same thing. I still do and I am convinced that healing is one of my purposes in life. I love to imagine myself healing the sick and shutting down all hospitals because there is no longer a need for them. In one of my imaginative musings Oprah Winfrey is interviewing me because I became world renown for healing the sick like Jesus did. I have quite a vivid imagination and can call it up instantly as it is was a special gift bestowed upon me from on High. It may seem silly and way too far-fetched but I would really love to do healing work just like Jesus did. I don’t think it is far-fetched at all. I know there are healers in the world, but I am not talking about healing where you are praying for days and weeks and maybe the person would be healed. I am talking about instantaneous on the spot healing in 10 seconds or less just like Jesus did. If I could do that I would be thrilled! I would love to make the blind see, the deaf hear and erase all dis-eases from the planet forever. But I’m getting way off the subject here.
As I said, Jesus really clicked with me and he remains a huge part of life. I was a little confused though. Mom said that Jesus died on the cross so that we can be saved from sin and have everlasting life. Immediately I thought to myself if that is true then why do we still need funeral parlors and why do people still die. Wasn’t it 2000 years ago that Jesus did this? When was this deal going to go into effect? Something was not adding up but I never said a word. I was a little girl and the grown ups were supposed to be the smarter people.
Another thing that didn’t make sense is that in the old testament God decreed an eye for an eye, but the new testament said turn the other check. To me it had to be one or the other, not both. That just did not make any sense to this little girl. Neither did ideas like punishing the sins of the father unto generations afterward. But I went along with it all until I was old enough to choose my own spiritual path. Additionally, I had my own mystical experiences as a little girl that helped to make me suspicious of what I was learning in religion about God. I tried to share one of them with my mother once but she poohed, poohed it and said I must have been dreaming. I knew that I wasn’t. These things happened to me in broad daylight, so I simply decided never to share them again. I mean if your own mother can’t take you seriously then you know you shouldn’t mention any mystical experiences you have to anyone one else.
When I was 18 I read the entire Bible from cover to cover. I was fascinated by it. If you read the Bible, not from a religious standpoint, but as you would read any novel, it really is one of the most extraordinary books ever. A lot of things did not jive for me, but I also found it to be one of the greatest metaphysical books I ever read up to that point. Actually, it was the only metaphysical book I had ever read by the time I turned 18. At the time I did not know it was called metaphysics, but I sensed between the lines many “secrets” to life. I also sensed where I felt information was missing. The whole story was not being told and maybe there was some altering to make you think a certain way. I started reading the Bible once a year during Lent and I did that for nearly ten years. I eventually started to listen to my urges to read other books. I don’t believe that Jesus only spoke through the Bible and after that he never said another word. Why could there not be other books containing the teaching of Jesus. I was guided to read The Life & Teaching of The Masters of the Far East by Baird T. Spalding. They are a six volume set of books that absolutely changed my life and I have never looked back. I was 28 years old when I first read those books. I then spent years wishing that I could move to India and study with the Masters of the Far East just like Spalding did. I wanted Emil to come into my life and help me just like he did with Baird Spalding. And if I was Baird Spalding there is no way that I would have ever returned to life the way it was; but then again if Spalding had not returned we would not have these wonderfully inspiring books.
After all these years I now know that I do not have to retreat from every day life and move to India to study with the Masters because that was the old way. I can do it right where I am here and now. One does not have to go off into a cave and spend all day in meditation and prayer. I am really happy about that because I love life and being out in the world. The thing is to be in the world but not of the world. I have since read many other books during my search for the meaning of existence and what part I am playing in it.
One of the things that stuck out for me in my early spiritual enlightenment years is that none of the major religions of the world honor the Mother principle of God. God is both the Mother as well as the Father. The major religions always mention the Father and that should be so, but you are only acknowledging one half of Infinite Mother Father God. The Father is the Mind of God and the Mother is the Heart of God and all creation. The Mother has been all but eliminated from all books in the major religions. Additionally, the feminine is not even respected. Throughout the world women and girls are disrespected in various ways from domestic violence to rape. In some countries female babies are not even valued which is really twisted when you consider that we all come out of the vagina of women. Some men have the nerve to devalue females when they come right out of our bodies. If that isn’t a great example of the height of twisted thinking I don’t know what is.
The Mother, the heart of creation, is the missing link. Females have a definite place in the scheme of life. It is a beautiful thing and no one should ever feel threatened by it.
This is not a feminist teaching. It simply IS. Fully acknowledging the male and female principle was always intended. One is not more important than the other. If it were the other way around with only the Mother being acknowledged the world would still be in chaos.
I am glad that I decided to go on my own independent spiritual search for the meaning of life. I long ago mentally discarded the book of acknowledge of good and evil for the Book of Life, which can also be translated as the Book of Love. Love is Life and Life is Love.