It has been quite a while since I posted on my blog, but I was not motivated. I have been so busy at work that by the time the work day was over I had no energy left to sit down and blog in the way that I have always enjoyed. I was also stressed out. The only thing that I was looking forward to for weeks was my annual spiritual retreat in Montreal, and that took place in August. I needed it and enjoyed it immensely. I am recharged while at the same time feeling extremely vulnerable to God. I have been feeling this way for quite some time. It is hard to explain. All I can say is that I feel like I am standing naked before the Presence of God. There is no more looking to the world for fulfillment in the human sense. I enjoy my life and I am so thankful for everything, but I am recognizing a deeper meaning to it all that is making my perspective of life change. I am falling deeper in love with life.
As my True Self begins to emerge I realize more than ever that from the time I breathed my first breath after my Mom birthed me that I have simply been starring in a stage play called Xenia’s Life on earth. However, it is time to wake up from the stage play and begin work on the deeper meaning of my life and how I can help others to do the same.
I AM is how Consciousness acknowledges Itself. The first act of Consciousness is awareness. Consciousness turning within realizing that It exists, and making contact with that point of Light that burst into a Living Flame. I hope that I am not sounding too wacky, but I don’t know how else to explain it.
I started graduate school on September 14th. I am working on earning a Master of Arts in Liberal Studies from the same college that I just graduated from. They have the best Masters program for what it is I really want to focus on in life. I checked it out, and sure enough it is a perfect fit. “The Master of Arts in Liberal Studies (MALS) is designed for educators, artists, writers, activists, advocates, lifelong learners and others who, in collaboration with their academic adviser, want to create the design and focus of their own unique graduate degree plan. These are people with experience, imagination and creativity — active learners who value an interdisciplinary sequence of studies focused on a central theme, concept or issue.”
My thesis statement is, Does the concept of God the Father also include God the Mother, and if so what happened to the Divine Feminine Principle over the last two thousand years? Why is she not prominent in conversation, or really in many cases not acknowledged at all? Since I really will have to go back further than 2000 years I will have to tweak my thesis statement.
My workplace paid for fifty percent of the tuition, but I am searching for graduate school money because I already know that I cannot work full-time while also attending graduate school full-time. I am taking two classes this semester, but starting January 2016 I am going full-time with three classes and 9 credits per semester. As a full-time undergrad, working full-time was hell. Graduate school is harder, so it would be double hell. Sometimes I wonder if I should sell my house which would get rid of the mortgage, but I still would have to live someplace, so I may as well keep my house. Plus I really do still love it so much and I am not ready to move. I have to find some way to live while being a full-time student. There is so much going on in my life and graduate school is just one major aspect of it. I am shooting for a June 2017 graduation.
Last week I had a three-day mandatory Residency for both of my graduate courses. The days were long but filled with a wealth of information to steer the graduate students towards success. We had to read The Structure of Scientific Revolution by Thomas Kuhn in preparation for Residency. Additionally we had to read The Souls of Black Folk by W.E.B. DuBois and Representations of the Intellectual by Edward Said, also for Residency.
So tell me, what have you been up to all summer?